Random Thoughts #3

Looking back at all that I’ve done and tried doing, there only seem to be two things that I’ve been consistent at. These two habits, irrespective of the place I moved to and the emotions I went through remained the same. The habits in fact are two games and the only two games that haven’t left my interest ever since I started playing those. The first is Solitaire and the second Sudoku.

Now that I think about it, they have lessons to teach too. Today as I was slashing through the cards, winning and sometimes getting the dialog box saying ‘No More Moves’; giving up then and at times pressing Ctrl+z, a thought came to my mind. It is not just a game where you stack the cards and order them to get rid of them, it tells us not to give up. There is always a way to win it and it does not have to be the same path. Even if you miss two-three matches that had to be done in a pass, there are always ways to make it up to it later. Even if you run out of moves, you can undo your doing and move a card back. Of course, we do not have such privilege in real life as this game that we are on, is time based which, showing off its stubborn attitude doesn’t wait for anything or anybody. But I still feel, there are ways, ways in which you can make up to what went wrong. Because if we try, we might fail again, but if we don’t, the statistics just won’t change.

Contrasting to this one, is Sudoku. It just has a single way of solving it. I guess it tells us about some places where only that one thing needs to be done to get the puzzle right. Excluding time, it might mean to just put the right number in and you are done. The trick is to not give up and be on it, to bear it, to not lose interest, to strive for the complete picture. My father was the one who taught me how to work it out. And to this date, whenever I see the block, it reminds me of him. At present, there is stuff between us, that probably cannot be sorted any time soon, because there is no problem which needs solution, there is just vacuum. I’ll have to figure this 5-star rated block. I hope there’s still time left. Writing this makes me emotional; thinking about the time when I first solved the block and was so happy when I beat an elder cousin at it. I was proud of it. I used to have this thought whenever I ended up being sad, ‘Don’t worry, He is there. He is with you, no matter what.’ It used to relieve me of all doubts. This one line gave me peace. Life’s changed… Even so, I’m happy that Sudoku still remains with me and it will always remain reminding me of my roots.

Yet again it is the ‘things’ that bring you back on the right track. And still people say not to be materialistic. Sometimes you just have to and need to value that sheet of paper more than the person who gave it to you. Because the person might have left while the emotion still lives within the dead tree making you think for once, that life… life is not as bad as it is made to seem.

P.S: It is 1:00 in the night and there is no internet connection. I am listening to Korean songs. No, I don’t understand the language, of course except some words (thanks to all the dramas). But I feel as though the emotions are similar. The tune somehow tells me what might the song be about. Maybe that’s the beauty of music. No matter the language, it is bound to make you feel. It is all about the right notes and the right rhythm.

#StyZie